Monday Kfirst Kickstart: “I’ll Know It When I See It” #OffScript

A screenwriter can spend months, or even years, perfecting a script. However, sometimes, the most iconic lines uttered on the silver screen aren’t the result of a writer at the top of his or her game, but rather an actor offering up some creative ad-libbing. Some of the most iconic moments in movie history were “off script.”

For example:
“Mr. Stark, I don’t feel so good.” – Avengers Infinity War
“Here’s Johnny” – The Shining
“Here’s looking at you, kid” – Casablanca
The Joker’s slow clap – The Dark Knight
“I’m king of the world.” – Titanic
“You’re gonna need a bigger boat” Jaws

“Off script” seems to be a very apt way to describe what often happens to all of us. Something transpires in our lives that strays away from our intended plan(s). But that’s most of real life happens. It’s “off script”; completely unexpected and unplanned. This June, join us as we head into a story that is everything but “expected” by the people involved. The book of Ruth is canvas to view a beautiful picture of God’s love engaging in our “off scripted” lives.

Check out the service from the website or from the Facebook livestream. 

Other thoughts from the Youversion notes from Sunday:

  • Christ-like love knows no limits, takes costly risks, and looks for ways to give more.
  • God‘s kindness moves us from emptiness to abundance.
  • Compassion reorients our soul. It shifts our heart from focusing in to focusing out.
  • Too often the New Testament Church treats the presence of God with an Old Testament mentality.
    • God’s presence doesn’t stay in a building, it goes with us.

Purchase the Scripture Journal of Ruth HERE

Love you all. Have a great week.

BTW: Here’s a great song for the week…

Monday Kfirst Kickstart: “Reaching Through the Rubble”

Today I want to give you a place to start your week. It’s Monday and in the wake of a great weekend and a workweek ahead, sometimes you just need a “kickstart” to get focused.  So grab some coffee let’s start a great week together.

 

 

 

 

 

Yesterday we continued our series “Back to the Table” at Kfirst. Though this is a new series of talks, the topic is NOT new as this is our third series that visits the “table practice of Jesus.” We see our lives as a “table” of hospitality. We see opportunities to change the world is done through Jesus’ approach to others at a shared table.

The “Table” is really three specific items: It is the SYMBOL, the MESSAGE, and the ACTION of the Kingdom of God. So when we show the radical hospitality of Jesus, we show, speak, and live the Kingdom of God.

Today we had a special morning as we turned our attention to the table practice of Christ including orphans. We at Kfirst believe that true ministry to the world includes foster care and adoption.  James 1:27 says,

Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.

Our heart is to be engaged in some way to come along side of orphans “in their distress.” It may not look like others, but it engages with foster kids to remind them they are loved and valued. You can’t do everything, but you can do something. And our question today: What is the “something” that you can do?

If you’re wanting to do something, please connect by contacting our KFAM community (click on the name). We’d love to challenge you to find some way to reach those who need the most help.

Love you all. Have an amazing week.

2 Minute Devo: “Remove the Weight” Proverbs 12:25

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August is our journey through the 2 minute series called “Watch Your Mouth”.  I want to invite you to join me as we. It’s as simple as viewing  the vlog and reading the passage for the day.  Today’s passage is Proverbs 12:25:

Proverbs 12:25

25 Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.

Undermining Your Marriage

Dave and Anne diagonal

For this week’s marriage blog, I began to ponder this thing of undermining marriage.  There are moments when you and I unknowingly act out situations that, if not corrected, will end up undermining the growth, strength, and future of your marriage.  Where I struggle, is when I talk with couples who are acting out in a specific manner and KNOW what they are doing.  Sometimes it’s out of retribution or frustration. Some actions can be explained out of the nurturing they received as they grew up observing their own families who raised them. But their actions are only keeping the deadly carousel of death spinning faster and faster to the point where someone wants off and out of the relationship.

Habakkuk 2:9-11 says in The Message “Who do you think you are— recklessly grabbing and looting, Living it up, acting like king of the mountain, acting above it all, above trials and troubles? You’ve engineered the ruin of your own house. In ruining others you’ve ruined yourself. You’ve undermined your foundations, rotted out your own soul. The bricks of your house will speak up and accuse you.

The context, obviously, isn’t marriage. But the principle is very powerful. By the actions of the people, they are undermining their foundations (what their lives are built upon). Their lives are “rotting out” what they are assuming is so secure.

I reading this scripture, I began to brainstorm some random thoughts that will undermine (rot out) your marriage.  Maybe you can help me and add a few to this list.

Criticism. 
There’s a difference in being constructive with your spouse and being a source of constant agony and criticism.  Your home should be safe.  You spouse should feel safe with you.  Part of the safety is to have deep enough relationship where things of correction can and should be shared. BUT…if that is all your spouse hears…if he/she NEVER matches up to what you think they should be….marital weariness will set in. Lethargy will consume your spouse and undermine your marital joy.

Purposely cause stress.
Every single person has to deal with one form of stress or another on a daily basis. It is just a fact of life. Scientists have yet to discover a miracle cure that will just make our stress evaporate and therefore we have to find other ways to deal with it. Stress affects everyone and there are good and bad ways to deal with it. When you know your spouse stresses over certain issues, your attempt to be playful by irritating those issues will not come off in a healthy way.  To attack sensitive areas of stress will speak a lack of care and creative a rift between you and your spouse. It will undermine rest and peace in your marriage.

Tolerate Pornography.
Guilt, mistrust, and anger about pornography can tear your marriage apart. Turning to pornography may cause your spouse to withdraw from your relationship because he receives instant gratification from his/her fantasies. When your spouse views porn you may feel disrespected, take it personally, and believe that you aren’t enough for him. This can create a wedge in your marriage. Pornography could make it difficult for your husband to see sex as a loving form of communication. As a result, pornography can decrease sexual satisfaction within your marriage.

Entertain a “single” lifestyle.
I read a great article by Focus on the Family which stated, “Over the past century, the path to marriage has grown increasingly dominated by an entertainment-based dating system that makes the time couples spend together full of ticketed events: movies, concerts, sporting events and so on. It’s a season characterized primarily by fun. After moving from that season into the routine life of marriage, couples often find it challenging to stop focusing on fun and begin the work of building a marriage.” We could turn this into it’s own blog, but when we entertain a single lifestyle, we get duped into a false sense of what we are missing.  It get’s our focus off of what we need to work on and into what we think we are missing. It will undermine our sense of fulfillment in our marriage.

Be too busy for your marriage.
Being too busy…such as not properly communicating or spending quality time. It’s not allowing intimacy. Workaholism is being unavailable on every level (spiritual, emotional, physical, etc). I understand busyness and I understand providing for your families. I understand sacrifices that are a part of life.  What I don’t understand is doing it all while sacrificing family. This is where openness needs to be fostered in the marriage to help warn against signs of workaholism and the dangers that come from absent spouses.  Busyness easily undermine the cohesiveness of your time together.

Threatening to leave.
This is an unnecessary risk and manipulation that may attract disaster to the relationship. If you make threats, you put in motion a destructive mentality. Why create what you don’t want? Why implant programming that undermines what you really want?
Why not foster an atmosphere of healthy conflict resolution so that you and your mate can make a mutual  commitment to heal upset feelings and work toward what you really want. Threats undermine trust in your marriage.

Fostering unforgiveness.
How can anyone behave differently towards you if you keep your hurts in the dark and do not give your spouse the opportunity to know what is true for you? How can you fully love someone else when you are holding on to the toxins of bitterness, sadness or regret? Unforgiveness is the cancer of marriage and I can’t preach, teach, blog, and counsel on it enough.  I deal with this more than most. Forgiveness is a decision.  Healing comes in time.  Trust comes in time.  Make a decision to walk in forgiveness and grace the way Christ has done with you.  Unforgiveness will break apart and undermine your marriage.

Refuse to admit you’re wrong.
It’s nothing more than prideful crap. I’m sorry to be so blunt. It’s a dumb facade that people put up to protect some false sense of security. Your refusal to admit wrong puts a barrier around you.  It’s not that you are not “touchable.” It’s that your spouse doesn’t want to come near you. Pride repels love.  Pride disfigures you and creates an unattractive image about you. Pride will undermine intimacy in every way.

Making decisions without your spouse.
Not letting the partner influence your decisions is a sure way to undermine oneness and invite insensitivity and defensiveness. By not listening you are not respecting your mate. I bring up Psalm 133 a lot in marriage counseling. “Where there’s unity, God commands his blessing.” I’m not saying you don’t have the faculties to make decisions without your spouse, but when your spouse doesn’t feel like a part of the marriage because he/she has no say in the marriage does nothing but undermine communication and vision for your marriage.

Refusing to care for yourself.
What does the way you care for yourself speak to your spouse? By not staying healthy (not taking care of yourself, your appearance, abusing substances, addictive patterns, etc) makes a huge statement to your spouse that you don’t care.  Why did you care before you were married?  Why not care about it now? I’m not saying that you need to be back to a form you were on the high school team or pre-kids, but effort toward taking care of yourself in a healthy way speaks volumes of concern, stewardship, and love to your mate.  To ignore it is to undermine your marriage.

 

Did I forget some?  Are there others that need to be on here?

 

Thanks for letting me ramble…