Monday Kfirst Kickstart: “Mistress Validation”

Today I want to give you a place to start your week. It’s Monday and in the wake of a great weekend and a workweek ahead, sometimes you just need a “kickstart” to get focused.  So grab some coffee let’s start a great week together.






Sunday, we continued our series at Kfirst. Last year, we took 6 weeks to bring a focus on something that far too many people do not understand: our emotions. It’s our emotional state that people can go into one of two extremes. On one hand, people can live completely in the wake of their emotions. They’ll operate not at a state of truth but in the pace of their passion for that day. On the other hand, there are those that completely disregard their emotions as if they were a curse or a weakness. It is as if emotions are something to endure in this life on earth instead of seeing them for which God sees them.

What I see in scripture is that our emotions are, first, a gift from God. They are part of our humanity. Second, if they are a gift, then we have a responsibility to steward (manage) them. This takes emotional discipleship; growing what we have deeper in the knowledge and passion for Christ.

Sunday, we looked at Matthew 6:1-18 and dealt with VALIDATION. There is this emotional response to desire to feed off the approval of others to find our validation. Validation is really about three things:

  • Attention met by being “present” (listening, engaging)
  • Affection need is met both physically and verbally.
  • Affirmation need is met by emotional support.

Jesus received all at His baptism. Matt. 3:17, The Father and the Holy Spirit showed up [attention]“This is My beloved Son [affection] in whom I am well pleased [affirmation]”

Unhealthy, dysfunctional behavior stems from striving to find your validation (attention, affection, and affirmation), not from Jesus, but from others. And instead of living FROM His approval, we live for it from people.

Check out the message here:

Other thoughts from Sunday:

  • The more I fill myself with God’s truth, the less I need to chase the opinion of others.
  • Start living FROM approval instead of living FOR approval.
  • Your value was never meant to be found in the opinion of others, but the person of Jesus.
  • Christ accepts you where you are at and loves you too much to leave you that way.
  • “The lie of approval is if the “right” people like you, you will feel loved. You won’t. You’ll just feel the long hell of winning their approval again and again.” – Sammy Rhoads

Love you all. Have an amazing week.

Monday Kfirst Kickstart: “Stand in Greatness”

Today I want to give you a place to start your week. It’s Monday and in the wake of a great weekend and a workweek ahead, sometimes you just need a “kickstart” to get focused.  So grab some coffee let’s start a great week together.






Yesterday we continued our series “The Collective” at Kfirst. We are taking a few weeks to cast vision for a shift in our church community. We are desiring to move from “Membership” to “Partnership.”

We are using Paul’s letter to Philemon to help be the launch point as Paul uses the word, Koinonia twice to emphasis his heart for for the church (v. 6 & v.17). This wonderful Greek word means

  • fellowship, a collection, community, communion, joint participation, a proof of fellowship
    • Of business: it was a partnering or merging
    • Of the Church: it was sharing issues, sharing the load

This is the heart of the shift. We want to see ourselves as partnering (Koinonia) with God and each other to further His Kingdom.

In week 2, we settled in Nehemiah 6 at how the people of God stood to carry out the vision together.

  1. I am engaged in a GREAT work. (Nehemiah 6:3)
    • “Walls” in scripture is meant to symbolize authority, protection, and security. And when opposition comes, there was the temptation to deal with things outside of the authority, protection, and security of God. Nehemiah doesn’t fall for it. He keeps himself focused on the “great work” God has in front of him. This is what steadies our feet in the direction God has placed us. We deal with life by what God by the example Jesus has given us.
  2. I possess a GREATER determination. (Nehemiah 6:8-9)
    • When opposition comes, we don’t get distracted. We get determined. If we can see understand what truth looks/sounds like (Jesus), and we can realize who the Enemy is, we’ll develop a greater determination.
  3. I live from a GREATER position. (Nehemiah 6:11)
    • Your stance depends upon your position. And who we are in Christ says everything about how we stand. Nehemiah didn’t worry about what others were saying, he knew who he was in God.

How different will your week look like if you approached it with the mindset of “I am a part of a GREATER work”? What would it change? Would you see people different? Would your attitude change? Would you be less passive with grace and mercy? Would you heart break for others?

Ask the Holy Spirit to help you step into the week PARTNERING with the Holy Spirit as you stand in the greatness of God, shining your light to the greater Kalamazoo area.

Love you all. Praying for you this week.